Friday, July 8, 2011

Day 17 Idle Kids

I was lying on my bed, taking a break when I reflected on how sibling bickering is driving me crazy! I’ve got to figure out a way to cut down on their quarrels. And it isn’t just the fighting, but the goading that goes on and the stubbornness. The diva is never wrong and can’t stand to proved otherwise, which my son loves to do every chance he gets. I’ve tried reminders, talking to them both, time outs, taking points away from their reward charts and taking away privileges-- and that’s all from today alone! I’m really starting to understand the phrase “Idle hands are the devil’s playground.” I think I’ll be finding projects or crafts for them to do from now on or I’m going to need the time out more than them! I purposefully left our schedules open this summer instead of signing them up for a bunch of camps. I spent the whole school year running from one place to the next. Whether it was vision therapy, basketball, social group, ballet, tutoring, school meetings, or the multitude of doctor appointments, the kids and I always had some place to be. It seemed that there was never a day of rest and it really took its toll on us all. Some of those things were important for my son with Asperger's Syndrome and ADHD, some were added because my kids should be allowed to have fun too! It also seemed unfair to make my daughter go to all these places for my son without giving her something that she could call hers.   
This summer I wanted to limit that as much as possible for all our sanity’s sakes. We only have track two nights a week, which the kids and I both can enjoy at the same time, and tutoring for my son two times a week. Okay, I did put my mini developer into a LEGO engineering camp, but it’s only for one week and half days at that. I have no doubt that he’ll love it and it will give his aspie brain an opportunity to do what it does so well, create new models. The week of that camp will be a busy one, but it’s only one week. After that, all of our events are scheduled so that we have long four day weekends. Gotta love a weekend getaway! 
In order to get through the less eventful weeks, I will need to squash the squabbles. No time better than the present to start practicing this. So, as I was trying to breathe and flow in the solace of my room instead of losing my cool and putting everyone to bed by 7:00 pm, I decided I needed to find a smile moment. I pulled out some treats, put in a movie of my choice (Oh no, I’m not giving them another opportunity to disagree on something) and made a pallet for the kids in front of the television. There’s something about a few blankets and pillows on the floor of a dark room that makes them quieter. Notice I said quieter instead of quiet, pallets aren’t miracle workers! It was better than the constant shift of children though. My son has this inability to sit, especially when the movie plot is getting more intense. He always ends up standing in front of the television! My daughter is constantly moving and most of the time, she is moving on top of you! You can now see why I like the pallet so much. Even when they're idle, they're not so idle. 
After the movie, I felt better than I did before I took a break. I did take the time to write a bit while the movie was on to prevent being up really late again, but as I sat here putting down my thoughts from the day, my daughter sat down beside me and promptly fell asleep. I’m going to end today’s entry so I can put her to bed. Yes, I could ask my husband to do it, but time slips by too fast and before you know it, I won’t be able to carry her in my arms. So I’ll pick her up, lay her in bed, kiss her on the cheek and smile knowing that I had another chance to cradle my baby girl. I’ll step across the room and kiss my son goodnight as well and tell him I love him. I’m sure I will think to myself  “They get along so well when they’re sleeping!” and smile as I close the door.

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